Shino's Birthday
by Fate no Ito
Summary: It's Shino's birthday and everyone wants to throw a surprise party for him. But Shino doesn't want a surprise party because he's...well...Shino. What will happen? Definitely chaos! No pairings. R
1. Default Chapter

AOU: I was planning on updating Konoha and Sand Shinobi right now but I have a brain dead problem...

Neji: haha

AOU: I know that Shino's b-day is actually on January 23 but oh well

Sasuke: How would you know something like that...?

AOU:...handbook...

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or anything that appears in this fic. Kiba's version of happy birthday is something I made up myself without really thinking...

FIC START

Shino didn't want to blare it out to the world but today was his birthday. His father, who's name is Ken or someting, (his name is seriously Ken or something) was on a vacation to collect bugs from Hawaii and he left a note last night, saying he wouldn't be back until next month. Which was just sad.

Today, Kurenai was letting them get off training so he decided to go to his favourite bug-hunting site.

When he arrived, he noticed there were balloons and streamers and stuff EVERYWHERE! So, he said to no one in particular. "I wonder what happened?"

Looking down, he saw a ladybug on a blade of grass. "What happened?" He asked.

The ladybug just looked at him funny and said, "Um...dunno."

So the ladybug flew away because Shino was just FREAKING HER OUT! Shino sighed. _Everybody thinks I'm freaky. _He was just thinking something along those lines when all of a sudden, Kiba, Hinata, Kurenai, Sasuke, Neji, Naruto, Lee, Tenten, Ino, Sakura and all the other members of Naruto, popped out.

"SURPRISE!" yelled everybody. Well, almost everybody. Neji had no idea what the fudgecakes he was doing there, so all he did was stand there and wave the little banner/streamer thing Tenten told him to wave when they jumped out and yelled, "SURPRISE!" Because it just happened to be on the week Tenten had her 'period', and she was PMSing quite a bit these days, Neji decided to just do what she told him and not get all Main House/Branch House-y on it.

"Uh...what are you guys doing here?" Shino asked no one in particular. Everybody stared at him.

"We're waiting for you!" Kiba said in a voice that just screamed, 'duh'.

"Uh...the question is, what are you guys doing here waiting for me?" Shino scowled but no one could see because of that Auron-y collar. "You're scaring all the bugs away. Look." Shino pointed and everybody saw a little bumblebee flying away. "He's saying 'it's too loud here'." Shino translated.

"Come ON! For all YOU know, he could be getting his friends to celebrate with us!" Naruto said stupidly, not knowing Shino could talk with bugs. And understand them.

"Uh...he was actually saying 'it's too loud here.'" Shino mumbled. Hinata decided to step in a bit, "A-A-Anno, Shino-kun! H-Happy birthday!"

"Yeah, Shino, happy birthday!" Said everyone, save Neji. Neji looked surprised but you couldn't tell because his eyes showed absolutely NO EMOTION AT ALL! "It's Shino's birthday?"

"How STUPID can you be, Hyuuga?" spat Sasuke. "We show up, throw a surprise party for a guy who acts like a log for no reason? Unless Christmas came early this year, it's obviously Shino's birthday!" Neji glared daggers at him. "Watch it, Uchiha..." He raised his palm threateningly and was about to give Sasuke the Gentle Fist of the century when this time, Lee stepped in.

"Now, now, Sasuke-kun. Neji. Don't pick a fight on Shino's BIRTHDAY!" Shino decided to just slip away now. "Bye." He mumbled. And started disappearing in a cloud of kikai bugs.

All the girls screamed, 'EW!" and Neji, Sasuke, Lee, Naruto and Kiba all dived at the cloud of bugs. "Ew!" Neji cried when some of the bugs got into his hair.

"SHINO! IF YOU DON'T COME OUT HERE, RIGHT NOW, I'M GOING TO HAVE TO KICK YOUR BUTT!" Kiba yelled, shaking his fists at the cloud.

"WHOO-YA!" Lee yelled, karate-chopping the bug-cloud. But Shino was long gone.

"Aw..." Said everyone. "Let's go home." Kurenai said and everybody save Kiba, Hinata, Neji, Lee and Sasuke poofed home.

"Why are we still here?" Demanded Neji. "I have a rant in my mind about the Branch House curse seals that I can't wait to use on Hiashi! I want to leave!" He tried to poof away but ALCHEMIST OF UCHIHA'S ALCHEMY STOPPED HIM!

"AH!" screamed Lee. "I can't feel any of my Chakra!"

Everybody stared at him weird. "You couldn't...feel any Chakra in the first place." Kiba pointed out. I just realized Akamaru didn't do anything yet in this chapter! So, I'll make him do something. Akamaru gave a shrill bark. T: Let's just go after Shino!

Kiba agreed and the dynamic duo ran off to where Shino was living, followed by Neji, Lee, Sasuke and Hinata.

(At Shino's House)

Dammit, I wish Shino would just change his fricking name to Shion. DAMMIT! STUPID TYPOS!

Ahem.

Anyway...Shino was in his room, counting how many bugs he had in his collection and how many more he needed to join the Cool-Sunglasses-Bug-Collector club that he thought was cool. Apparently, his dad had been in it before and you get free chocolate fudges every week! Yummy...

"Shi...no...!" Kiba yelled in a scary-dumb voice. Shino looked out the window and saw Kiba standing on Sasuke's shoulders who was standing on Neji's shoulders who was standing on Lee's shoulders. Hinata just waited around because she was too shy to be on anyone's shoulders.

"What is it, Kiba?" Shino deadpanned, wondering what would happen if he made Kiba fall.

"You ditched us when we were throwing a party for you! Have you anything to say for yourself?" Kiba spazzed, waving his arms. Akamaru barked loyally, even though Shino had no idea what the hell Akamaru was trying to tell him.

"Uh...right." And he slammed the window. But because Kiba's hands were on the windowsill, Kiba got shocked and leaned back, waving his arms wildly. Sasuke lost his balance, which made Neji lose his balance, which made Lee lose his balance. "OH NO!" screamed everyone as they fell down into the black oblivion...

And died...

Just kidding!

You have to wait till the next time I update to learn!

AOU: Yay! First chapter finished in record time!

Sasuke:...also known as...the longest time spent on a chapter?

AOU: One of them

Neji: 2 hours 31 minutes 32 seconds

AOU: Uh...yeah. I timed that on my watch...

Sasuke: you actually started this at around 5:00 and ended it at around 7:00?

Neji: Both A.M. too...

AOU: Ah, no wonder I'm always pretty tired in the afternoon

Sasuke and Neji: NO DUH!

AOU: Anyway, review please! This was originally gonna be in Hokage's Scrolls but after I deleted Hokage's Scrolls, I made this a story by itself! REVIEW!


	2. AAAAHHH!

Raven: Wow, my computer is screwed! The entire screen is like, MAXIMIZED!

Nightwolf: We're too lazy to do much about it though...

Raven: This chapter is solely written by Nightwolf, who has become quite skilled, I must admit.

Nightwolf: Yuppers! So I'm writin' while Raven watches Beyblade until her eyes fall...

Raven: You can't blame me! (sees readers gawking at her) WHAT? If you watch Japanese version, you might just understand I like hearing the voices of Rei's and Kai's seiyuus! I LOVE their voices!

Nightwolf: Riiight. I noticed that Rei's voice in Japanese is TOO girlish. Kai's is okay...and Takao sounds like Naruto! Could it be they're the same seiyuu?

Raven: we never bothered with checking...ANYWAY!

Nightwolf: My next solo fic (happy sigh)

FIC START

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Yelled everyone as they fell. Shino poked his head out the window to look and had to suppress a laugh even though it was awfully mean to laugh at his friends' misfortune. In this case...it was a TERRIBLE misfortune!

It was SO horrible, I dare not describe it in words here! Which means I'm just plain lazy. Lol.

Akamaru whined piteously as he picked himself up. "O-Oh dear!" Hinata cried, running forwards. She took out that little lotion-medecine thingy and began to heal the people.

Because this is a wild fanfic world, they healed instantly.

"Thanks, Hinata!" Smiled Kiba when he sat up again.

Hinata smiled. "W-We have to give Shino-kun his birthday present!" She presented a badly wrapped box covered with pink sparkles and neon green kikkai bug shapes.

Shino leaned out and yelled in a stoic fashion. "I apologize for the fall."

"Don't worry about it." Neji grumbled, standing up and dusting him down. Shino was confused but Neji continued anyway. "I think you forgot to break my spleen, since I think that's the only part of my body that I can feel. Don't worry, though. I'm not completly mad at you, Shino."

Sasuke raised his eyebrows as he dusted himself. "why?"

Neji shrugged. "At least he isn't from the MAIN HOUSE! Then I would be holding a BIG serious grudge against him, considering I'm a caged bird from the BRANCH HOUSE!"

Everybody sweatdropped. Kiba, after a pause, asked Shino. "Why don't you want to celebrate your birthday? Is it because it's like Raven's birthday? You know, from Teen Titans?" His eyes got real big as Shino sweatdropped even further.

"What happens on this...Raven's birthday?" Neji asked, shuddering as he remembered the OTHER more sadistic Raven he just happened to know.

"She's destined to destroy the world!" Kiba yelled, his eyes growing wide. Yes, if you watched Birthmark, The Prophecy or either one of The End from Teen Titans, that wouldn't have come as a surprise! If you haven't, sorry for the GIANT spoiler, since the entire Season 4 is based on Raven's birthday!

Anyway, Shino sighed. "I never knew you watched Teen Titans, Kiba."

"Yeah!" Piped up Neji. "I always thought you would watch something like...I dunno..I Love Lucy reruns."

"Do they even play that anymore?" Sasuke asked conversationally.

Shino sighed, figuring he should be polite, at least. "Would you all like to come in and celebrate my birthday that I figured you all would forget?"

"SURE!" Laughed everybody heartily. After much hearty laughing from Kiba, Hinata, Sasuke and Neji, they all waltzed into Shino's house.

(Inside Shino's house)

There were pictures of kikkai bugs everywhere. "Er..don't you have other decorations BESIDES bugs?" Sasuke asked after staring at some statues of kikkai bugs.

"No." Shino replied stoically, heading for the kitchen. Hinata and Kiba were behind him, although they were a lot slower than he was because it was rude to walk in front of the host!

Sasuke sighed and followed Kiba. Neji touched the antennae of a Kikkai bug statue but it fell off as soon as he touched it. _oh, shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! _He thought frantically. Licking his finger, he dabbed at the end of the antennae with his spit-covered finger and stuck it back on. It wasn't sticking!

"Neji, what are you doing?" Kiba asked, turning back to see Neji standing there and just licking his finger.

"Nothin!" Neji just stuck the antennae into the open mouth of the bug and ran to catch up with the others.

And I'll end it RIGHT HERE!

Nightwolf: Aren't I cruel?

Raven: Sure, sure. After a shocking twist of events, we're moving! Boohoo...

Nightwolf: Soon, we'll post our new address somewhere in our latest update so if you want, you can visit me sometime!

Raven: But if you're a sadistic murderer bent on ending my life, then I assure you, I'll be ready.

Nightwolf: If you guys come, I probably won't be home. Unlike Raven, I have a social life.

Raven: Shut up!

Nightwolf: Sorry it took so long to update! Stupid isn't letting us log on!


End file.
